Week 2: Peer Review

Kayla: I really enjoyed your posts this week. They were all so full of details. I especially enjoyed the post, "Describing an Individual" because by the time I finished reading it, I felt as though I had a pretty good understanding  of your best friend's personality and her admirable qualities. She sounds like a pretty great person to have in your life. Though you had a great use of detail, I'd like to recommend that you try varying types of sensory details. Sight and sounds are the most common details used in all writing, but if you could include descriptions of how things smell, feel, and taste I think you'd have some really great posts. Also, for you your "Mini Memoir" post, I got a general feeling for who you are but by the end I wanted to know more. All I'm trying to say is that if you have to write about yourself, don't be afraid to bare all and be candid. 


Rebecca:The first thing I wrote down after reading all of your posts for the week was that I thoroughly enjoyed your humorous tone. I felt that just through that I was able to learn a little about you and your personality. It makes for some great voice. I also really wanted to tell you that your descriptive pieces make me feel present as if I were actually there with you or if those were, in fact my own memories. For your "Sugar and Cinnamon" post, I would've liked to have read more of a description of the kitchen like the prompt called for, though I did enjoy reading about the doughnuts. Lastly, I would really just keep an eye out for changing tenses. I caught it several times in different posts of yours. It isn't a gigantic problem, but it has the potential to confuse your readers. 


Amanda:The very first thing I noticed about your posts was that they are jam-packed with information. Every one of them is overflowing with facts and clear memories; it really shows your attention to detail. Your posts also have great voice and convey that you are passionate about your life and set goals. In other words, your personality really shines through your writing. For next weeks' posts, I would recommend that you try dividing them into paragraphs. I feel like it would help define new ideas and thoughts, thus making your writing clearer. Also, I feel that maybe organizing your thoughts before you write may be a good technique to try. It would help you figure out where new paragraphs and subjects should start.