It didn't come on all at once with the sudden realization that it was gone. It was subtle and the realization that it was gone was just that. It was simple. Not overwhelming.
All my life my family, both on my mom's and my dad's side, have been LDS. I grew up in it. Don't get me wrong though, it wasn't as if the religion was shoved down my throat. It was always just my natural way of life, part of my upbringing.
Over the years, my immediate family was torn apart by my parents' divorce. Religious practices were offset by depression and stress. Eventually we all quit attending church. In high school, when I got my license, my sisters and I started going again. We really enjoyed all going together. I was happy because I felt that I was being a good example for them. A couple of years went by and there were aspects of the religion that I didn't necessarily agree with that I hadn't noticed as a child. There were simple things in my life that I did or said that I was forced to feel bad about. I'm not a horrible person by any stretch of the imagination.
I slowly stopped going to church and church activities. I would over sleep or fake sick. When my sister was old enough to drive, I quit everything altogether.
Over the span of at least a decade, I've lost my faith. I don't feel remorse over it either, just happy to live my life.
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